I remember watching gossip girl on tv with my older sister back in middle school. It was still on air at the point and I was about 13 when I first introduced to the world of Blair Waldorf. From that time forward, Blair Waldorf became my spirit animal. I admired the striking brunette known as “Queen Bee”. I saw part of me in her, I mean we both had a massive headband collection (that I still have…. oops), and we both have a deep love for brunch. But, as I’ve grown older I realized you must notice Blair Waldorf isn’t real (even though if she was I think we’d be best friends… duh). There’s many things about Leighton Meester’s character that I absolutely adore, but gossip isn’t one of them. Sure it’s captivating on netflix, but not when it’s you're the girl getting attacked for wearing shoes from last spring. Obviously the entire series of Gossip Girl was focused around who slept with who, and who was wearing what, but in real life it shouldn’t be like that. Gossip is cruel. Most of us have probably been targets of cruel gossip before, and trust me I know it’s not easy. I try to channel my inner Audrey Hepburn, but sometimes it’s hard to just turn the other cheek. Below are some of my tips for dealing with gossip, because let’s face it, whether you’re 13 or 30, people are going to gossip.
1.) Try to pretend like it doesn’t bother you once you’ve addressed the problem. I know faking a smile can be hard, but as a target of some nasty rumors before this is what helped me get through it. When the “mean girls” (or boys????) realize that these ridiculous rumors aren’t bothering you they’ll begin to stop messing with you. Just act as if nothing is different; take the same route to class as you always do and act like everything is completely normal. However, don’t completely ignore the gossip if it’s demeaning to your character.
2.) Don’t seek revenge. I know, I know revenge can be fun, but trust me like the quote says “The best revenge is massive success.” (If you don’t trust me, trust Frank Sinatra, he’s basically a genius.) Plus, if you stay positive they’ll eventually start feeling like a bad person and stop gossiping (unless they’re a complete, utter jerk). If you do try and seek revenge, it probably won’t end up they way you imagined and you might be the one in the principal’s office. Before you decide what you’re going to do about the gossip make sure you’ve thought carefully about your action; make sure your emotions don’t get in the way of your reasoning. Seriously though, nothing feels greater than walking through the hallway with a stunning outfit and knowing you just scored the winning goal or won an art competition, or maybe even just realized you’re too good for their petty drama. Heads will turn when you learn to ignore it and you’ll realize the best revenge is wearing a beautiful smile (kinda cheesy, but kinda cute).
3.) Avoid getting involved. This tip is pretty self explanatory, but I think we all might need a reminder every now and then. Like we were taught in grade school, “Treat others they way you would want to be treated”. If you don’t want a nasty rumor spread about you, don’t spread rumors about anyone else. Try to avoid drama too, whether it’s a fight between your best friend and her boyfriend or maybe a disagreement between two of your friends, remind them that you’re always there for them, but avoid getting in the middle of the situation. It also helps to try and stop gossip when you hear it. If one of your peers behind you is making fun of someone (whether he/she is your friend or not) turn around and remind that they should probably stop. You might get a snarky response, but at least you did your part as a responsible classmate.
4.) Don’t give them the attention they want. We all know it’s true, if people are spreading rumors about other people they probably don’t have as interesting of a life as their target. Maybe they're jealous of your boyfriend, clothes, or grades. Jealously is a part of human nature, we all get jealous every now and then. Sometimes I wish I was as athletic as some of my friends, or had a boyfriend, but instead of turning my jealousy into something damaging to my friendship I’ve decided it’s best to accept someone is always going to have something you want (…and vice versa. You’ll always have something someone else wants). But, remember to be thankful for what you’ve been blessed with thus fair. And if you want something really, really bad don’t forget you’ll have to work for it.ss
The best way to deal with gossip and rumors is to make sure you have the facts before you address the issue. Can you really believe that girl you’ve talked to twice this entire year about something your best friend said? Just make sure there’s a problem before addressing the gossip, or you might start one. Set a positive example for others by remaining positive even though sometimes it might be very hard to. Remember, success is the best revenge and honestly if they’re gossiping about you, they’re probably jealous of you. Stay firm in your beliefs and morals and don’t give the perpetrators the attention they’re seeking. And just remember gossip is temporary. Today’s gossip with be replaced with next week’s juicier secrets and trust me everyone will eventually forget.
But, hey since I’ve brought up gossip girl I might as well throw in some advice that sounds very Blair Waldorf. People are going to talk, you can either let their words slaughter you or you can hold yourself to a higher class and let their words bounce off of your longchamp as if it’s a shield.
What seems to be your best tips for dealing with gossip?
xoxo
1.) Try to pretend like it doesn’t bother you once you’ve addressed the problem. I know faking a smile can be hard, but as a target of some nasty rumors before this is what helped me get through it. When the “mean girls” (or boys????) realize that these ridiculous rumors aren’t bothering you they’ll begin to stop messing with you. Just act as if nothing is different; take the same route to class as you always do and act like everything is completely normal. However, don’t completely ignore the gossip if it’s demeaning to your character.
2.) Don’t seek revenge. I know, I know revenge can be fun, but trust me like the quote says “The best revenge is massive success.” (If you don’t trust me, trust Frank Sinatra, he’s basically a genius.) Plus, if you stay positive they’ll eventually start feeling like a bad person and stop gossiping (unless they’re a complete, utter jerk). If you do try and seek revenge, it probably won’t end up they way you imagined and you might be the one in the principal’s office. Before you decide what you’re going to do about the gossip make sure you’ve thought carefully about your action; make sure your emotions don’t get in the way of your reasoning. Seriously though, nothing feels greater than walking through the hallway with a stunning outfit and knowing you just scored the winning goal or won an art competition, or maybe even just realized you’re too good for their petty drama. Heads will turn when you learn to ignore it and you’ll realize the best revenge is wearing a beautiful smile (kinda cheesy, but kinda cute).
3.) Avoid getting involved. This tip is pretty self explanatory, but I think we all might need a reminder every now and then. Like we were taught in grade school, “Treat others they way you would want to be treated”. If you don’t want a nasty rumor spread about you, don’t spread rumors about anyone else. Try to avoid drama too, whether it’s a fight between your best friend and her boyfriend or maybe a disagreement between two of your friends, remind them that you’re always there for them, but avoid getting in the middle of the situation. It also helps to try and stop gossip when you hear it. If one of your peers behind you is making fun of someone (whether he/she is your friend or not) turn around and remind that they should probably stop. You might get a snarky response, but at least you did your part as a responsible classmate.
4.) Don’t give them the attention they want. We all know it’s true, if people are spreading rumors about other people they probably don’t have as interesting of a life as their target. Maybe they're jealous of your boyfriend, clothes, or grades. Jealously is a part of human nature, we all get jealous every now and then. Sometimes I wish I was as athletic as some of my friends, or had a boyfriend, but instead of turning my jealousy into something damaging to my friendship I’ve decided it’s best to accept someone is always going to have something you want (…and vice versa. You’ll always have something someone else wants). But, remember to be thankful for what you’ve been blessed with thus fair. And if you want something really, really bad don’t forget you’ll have to work for it.ss
The best way to deal with gossip and rumors is to make sure you have the facts before you address the issue. Can you really believe that girl you’ve talked to twice this entire year about something your best friend said? Just make sure there’s a problem before addressing the gossip, or you might start one. Set a positive example for others by remaining positive even though sometimes it might be very hard to. Remember, success is the best revenge and honestly if they’re gossiping about you, they’re probably jealous of you. Stay firm in your beliefs and morals and don’t give the perpetrators the attention they’re seeking. And just remember gossip is temporary. Today’s gossip with be replaced with next week’s juicier secrets and trust me everyone will eventually forget.
But, hey since I’ve brought up gossip girl I might as well throw in some advice that sounds very Blair Waldorf. People are going to talk, you can either let their words slaughter you or you can hold yourself to a higher class and let their words bounce off of your longchamp as if it’s a shield.
What seems to be your best tips for dealing with gossip?
xoxo
Just remember those rumors aren’t holding you back from anything you want to achieve. Take it from Blair Waldorf.